.:Saturday, February 23, 2008:.
You Can Thank Kim....
| for these! She's apparently going nuts with the emails today! Muwahahaha. A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover . In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents. 'When we were to be married,' she said, ' my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.' The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness. 'Honey,' he said, 'that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?' 'Oh,' she said, 'that's the money I made from selling the dolls.' A Prayer....... Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death, because I don't know how to crochet. |
I Just Couldn't Resist
A man is selling this table on ebay. Can you figure out how to tell that it is a man selling the table? Don't cheat and scroll down, just look at the picture first! Still can't figure it out? Look at the mirror! I almost pee'd my pants laughing at this one. Never, never take pictures while not dressed and then post them on the internet! Muwahahahaha....silly, silly boys! |
Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead!
| No, I won't explain the title, but needless to say I'm stress free again and ready to give you a good laugh too! Tehehehe....enjoy! THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. THAT WAS MY PAGER,' SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM. A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE SECOND YOUNG WOMAN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, 'THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND.' THE OLDER WOMAN FELT VERY LOW -TECH. NOT TO BE OUT DONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER REAR END. THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER. THE OLDER WOMAN FINALLY SAID.........WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT....I'M GETTING A FAX!! Muwahahahaha! Today is Kolby's very first martial arts stick tournament! He is super excited as are we. Hopefully we will be able to sneak a good picture or two since cameras aren't really allowed! Not much else to report. Jeff's working on the table. I'm doing laundry. Zoe isn't here as she stayed the night with a long time friend last night to help her celebrate her birthday. More to come later today though......MAYBE! See, no promises! XOXOXO |